Key Qualities of the Four Knot

Chief characteristic

Melancholy is the chief characteristic of the Four fixation. This deep resonant emotional demeanor flavors their expression. They often exude a feeling of tragedy, even when they are quite happy. They can be upbeat positive and fun to be around, yet there is always a sadness just below the surface.

Primary emotion

Sadness is the primary emotion. Even when they are angry, their anger seems to be channeled through sadness. They will cry faster than they will yell.

Body type

Fours tend to be full bodied, soft but strong. When they are the full bodied types their bodies seem to be holding the water of all their deep emotions. Hugging a full bodied Four is like being enveloped by the ocean.

Appearance

Fours are the best dressed of the Enneagram. They take time to pick out their clothes, and for women, to put on their makeup. The goal is to look natural, like they just threw their clothes on, even when they actually spent hours. They try to look unique but natural.

Talking style

The Four talking style is dramatic, and deep with resonant emotion. They love to share their tragic story.

Distorted Personal belief

There is something tragically wrong with me

World view

There is a unity of which I am not a part.

Primary fear

The fear of not belonging, of being an outsider is dreaded. When it comes up it is devastating. They feel left out and abandoned easily.

Avoidance

Fours avoid being ordinary; they have an unusual style of dress, and unique way of presenting themselves. They also want to do something out of the ordinary.

Coping Mechanism

Feeling all emotion as if it was theirs. This enables them to perpetuate the drama of emotions.

Childhood

Fours feel as if they were thrown out of paradise. They felt abandoned by their parents. Something tragic happened.